|EarthBound owned by Nintendo.|
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- After leaving Jackie’s Cafe you’ll receive a series of visits from passers-by. The sum of these conversations is a trip back east, to Dusty Dunes Desert. Grabbing a bus isn’t a bad idea, as it’ll go right past your destination. Hop off at the Drugstore.
- Now for some item-based fun. The next area is a maze full of monkeys, all of whom want items before they’ll let you step through their doorways. You need to appease each monkey to get through the place. It’s damned annoying, and you’ll want lots of room in your inventory to accommodate the necessary items. Sell anything you don’t need at the Drugstore, and call up Escargo Express to grab stuff you’d rather keep. There are no difficult encounters in the Monkey Cave.
- If you want to make this trip even easier, you can grab some of the items while you’re outside the Cave. A Wet Tower, a Skip Sandwich, and a Picnic Lunch can all be purchased from the Drugstore, and it’s not that difficult to track down a pair of Hamburgers. Jeff also starts the game with a Ruler, and he may still have it in his inventory. All of these items are useful in the Monkey Cave. You only need to buy a Picnic Lunch and a Skip Sandwich to proceed through the Cave; everything else is found inside.
- One last thing: BRING THE PENCIL ERASER DOWN. You’ll need it. Don’t forget this damned thing or you’ll be kicking yourself.
- The hole to the Monkey Cave is to the north of the Drugstore, and now it’s not blocked. Step inside and head west through the Cave to find the first pair of monkeys. The one on the right wants a Skip Sandwich; the one on the left wants a Picnic Lunch.
- Go through the right passage to find a Wet Towel, then turn back and go through the left passage. It leads to a Pizza. Continue west through here to find two more monkeys. Right wants a Wet Towel, left wants a Pizza. Behind the left monkey you’ll find a Pizza and a monkey who gives out an unlimited supply of Fresh Eggs. Don’t grab one just yet.
- Take the right path through this room to find a Hamburger and a Ruler. In the next room to the left are two more monkeys, both of which want Hamburgers. Their paths are both dead ends, and lead to a Fire Pendant (right) and a Broken Tube (left). Note that Double Hamburgers can substitute for Hamburgers down here.
- Backtrack to the entrance and go through the right tunnel. Beyond the chest where you found the Wet Towel are two monkeys. Right wants a Protein Drink, left wants a Pizza. Go past the Pizza monkey to find a Protein Drink, then double back, give the monkey his stupid Drink, and take the right path.
- Beyond is a Hamburger, and to the left are… yes… two monkeys. The left wants a Ruler, and getting past her will net you a King Banana. The right want a Fresh Egg, and you can deliver one from the monkey at the other end of the Cave. Return to the entrance (keep going right), then take every left path to reach the monkey with the Fresh Eggs. Don’t take too long returning the Egg, as they’ll eventually turn into Chicks and Chickens in your inventory. Annoying. Beyond this monkey is a Neutralizer.
- Return to the room where you found the Protein Drink (left door in the next monkey room) and you’ll find two more monkeys beyond. Right wants a King Banana; left wants a Hamburger. Go through the right door and you’ll find a Hamburger and a Picnic Lunch in the next chamber. Give the Hamburger to the left monkey to receive a Bag of Dragonite, a ridiculous one-use item that turns the user into a dragon for one round. Yikes.
- Past the Picnic Lunch and the Hamburger is the final room, where you’ll need the Pencil Eraser. Use it and you’ll find the room of Talah Rama, master of the Monkey Cave. Speak to him to receive the Yogurt Dispenser, loot the chests near him for a Cup of Lifenoodles and a Brain Food Lunch, and make your way out of the Cave. You neeeeeeever need to come back, thank god, though make sure you speak to the monkey in Talah Rama’s room before leaving. He’ll head outside too…
- … and teach Ness a new ability, PSI Teleportation. You can use it while outdoors to travel to any previously visited location. You need to travel in a straight line for a certain amount of time to Teleport, so you’ll want to use this on straight, unobstructed roads. Such as the road you’re on now! Use it to get to Fourside to continue your journey, and, soon enough, to get Paula back.
- Head to the Monotoli Building and speak to the maid who wanted the Yogurt Dispenser. She’s standing outside the Department Store. She’ll steal the Dispenser and rush upstairs. Follow her to the 47th floor via the elevator and another nearby elevator will continue your ascent.
- This next area is full of unnecessary rooms and Sentry Robots that you can never appease without a fight. The place is a semi-maze, but not a long one. To get through, take the third (normal) door on the left…
- … the north door in the next room…
- … the next north door to find a Sudden Guts Pill, then back to the previous room to head left instead…
- … the left door to find a Vital Capsule, then the right door…
- … the north door to reach the maid, who will give you Trout Yogurt…
- … and the left door in the previous room to reach the end. Clank clank.
This is a silly battle. Though it can hit fairly hard, as well as occasionally freeze your characters, the Clumsy Robot spends most of its turns mucking about. Its clumsy nature makes it difficult to hit with normal attacks, but normal attacks are all you should bother using, as this fight is hardly difficult. The Robot will occasionally eat a bologna sandwich which supposedly restores its HP, but in truth this is just another wasted turn. Do enough damage and some guys will rush in and end the fight for you. Yay!
- Cut scenes follow. Once they’re done you’ll have Paula back in the party. Yays. Leave the Monotoli Building and you’ll find a grand chariot waiting outside. Climb aboard and you’ll be shepherded off to Threed.
- Visit the crash site of the Sky Runner. Jeff will fix it up, and once he’s done you’ll take off for a new location in a distant land: Summers.