South Park - The Stick of Truth Walkthrough, Side Quests: Recruit the Girls

South Park - The Stick of Truth created by Ubisoft.
Images used for educational purposes only.
South Park
- To recruit the girls you must first make contact with 'em. Head to City Hall and you'll see a girl with blonde hair being picked on over her Justin Bieber doll. Take out the bullies (they're very easy) and you'll earn Annie's friend request - as well as a direct path to the girls, should you ask her. Agree to follow her and you'll be whisked away.
- Cut scene. Council of the girls! They're willing to help... buuuut you need to do something for them first. One convoluted plot later, you're off to pose as the boyfriend of one of the girls.
- And, hey, you might as well check out City Hall while you're here. (I honestly never have, not in this guide.) Check by the trees to the left of City Hall for a box containing Messy Face Paint, a Bird's Nest and $1.75, speak to Priest Maxi to receive the quest Find Jesus (he's on the bench), and speak to the mayor in City Hall to receive the quest The Homeless Problem. Check the cupboards in City Hall for $1.00, a Monocle, and a Strength Potion before you leave.
Find Jesus
- This quest is short, so we'll do it now. After speaking to Priest Maxi, head to the Church. Jesus isn't very good at hiding.
- Run back to Priest Maxi. He'll exhort you to look for Jesus one more time.
- Return to the Church. Turn off the main lights via the light switch to the right of the podium, then shine the two spotlights up at the crucifix on the wall. You'll find Jesus behind the podium. Talk to him to receive a Rosary, allowing you to summon him in battle, as well as the Jesus and Priest Maxi friend requests. All done!
Pose as Bebe's Boyfriend
- Right. This will be fun. Head to the Park. Look for the girl with brown hair, sitting on the bench near the pirate ship.
- Cut scene. Drama! And a battle!
Monica's Boyfriend
Very easy. His defenses are low, and one or two really strong attacks will drop him, boss or no boss. Kyle's Elemental Attack took him out in one hit for me. (And it seemed appropriate - Ike's about ten feet away, playing on the pirate ship.)
- After the fight you'll earn Monica's friend request. Head back to Annie by City Hall and drop by the girls' HQ again. More twists and turns! Ahhh!
- The next part will speak for itself. Just keep siphoning through the style options until the girls agree with your choices. You'll earn a Sparkly Unicorn Sticker for completing this one.
- In the next section of this quest, you're given a new role: head to Unplanned Parenthood and track down some very important records for the girls. This incredibly-offensive quest deserves its own article.
- After completing Unplanned Parenthood, return to Annie and zip back to the girls. They have a new task for you, as the last didn't quite pan out - they need a translation. Sigh. Well, at least it's not a new quest...
- Head to the Elven Forest and speak with Kyle. The intervening cut scene will tell you pretty much all you need to know: your next destination is Canada. Yes, Canada. Your next quest: Heading North. It's lots of fun, eh?
- After completing the quest, return to Annie once more. One final chat with the girls will earn you their allegiance - as well as three friend requests: Red, Bebe, and Wendy.
- Now you can wander around the girl's council chambers. Whatever you wanna call 'em. To your left is a chest; against it sits the Mouse-tik Chinpokomon, and inside the chest is a Valkyrie Headband, Armor, and Gloves. Also beside the chest is a blonde girl named Jessie who will friend request you.
- Talk to the rest of the girls in the room. You'll earn friend requests for Nelly, Heidi, and Allie Nelson. Speak to Red and you can purchase new items.
- Leave. (Gasp! So that's where it was!) You can now return to your buds and bring this quest line to a successful close. Hopefully.
- Be warned! Speaking to Kyle back at the Elven Forest will spark a new quest, one you cannot avoid nor leave. If you want to explore more before the endgame, now's the time to get it done.

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